muddled

[Deleted]

here in the shadows i love to lay
trying so hard to keep my fears at bay
i know i must again face the light
but, oh, how i hate, i hate to fight
my eyes they see the fear in them
it will fade, but i don't know when
quietly, i cry inside, calling
silently i try and fly, but i'm falling
catch me in your tight embrace
i love the love in your face
but only in my dreams...
only in my dreams do you hold me
console me
feeling the pain inside

~ipod

comments: bleh. it didn't come out right, but whatever. i tried. xD

[Warlock]

It sounds pretty good to me. Although, the phrase 'so hard' in the second line seems awkwards. And then the fifth line is a bit difficult to figure out.

I love how you didn't capitalise the word 'I'. ^_^

[Aveilthé]

I IS NOT A WORD; TIS A LETTER LOLOL.

In caps, kay. 8) And chatspeak which I utterly abhore forsomeunknownreasonwhy without spaces!

^ meks nu sense; kaoru ish tired.

Uhmmm. "I" can be a word. How controversial. Like. Waow. People will go into World War III now.

Ipod~chaaan. I really adore how you've under-alized (that not a word but me not care kay.) because it makes the poem-thing nice~like. The style, is, like, woah. THE STYLE IS SEXY I WANT TO MARRY IT KAY.

[/Attempt to be cute. Argh. Ignore this. IGNORE, I SAY! ooo, brackets, hee]

[Deleted]

lol, i love you guys. thanks for your compliments/comments.