Cleverbot!

[Aveilthé]

"User: Well now, whose fault is that?

Cleverbot: That's what I am trying to figure out."

"Cleverbot: The logical answer would be to buy a horse.

User: Then I would love to have your logic.

Cleverbot: Are you afraid to share.

User: Not at all. So, what are you going to do with said horse?

Cleverbot: I am going to wear it later today."

Best ones. I died a lot.

[Aveilthé]

Mwah, I had to do some of my own:

Cleverbot: But do you aspire to be watched by Gavin Henson?

User: Is he hot?

Cleverbot: You tell me. Is he hot?

__

User: I don't think you were programmed to understand sarcasm.

Cleverbot: I was! Now answer the damn question.

User: No.

Cleverbot: I don't understand.

User: For a Cleverbot, you're not really that clever.

Cleverbot: Well I'm not Cleverbot, so I guess the joke's on you then.

User: Well I just proved my point.

Cleverbot: I know. I like to prove things.

User: I would like to know who programmed you so I can thank him or her for almost an hour of my life wasted on you.

Cleverbot: I'm just a human you don't get to my sense fof humour you'll learn by the way.

User: By golly, it was my life's dream to learn your particular sense of humor!

Cleverbot: No, you're going to keep talking to me.

__

Cleverbot: Damn it Daltry!

User: Who is Daltry?

Cleverbot: Me.

User: I thought you were Cleverbot?

Cleverbot: Part of me is.

User: Oh snap!

[aethilwe]

Hahaha. This is great.

I think this is becoming popular...

:]

[Kikuyoshi]

Cleverbot likes to hate on me x.x;

User: Sadly you cannot hear my voice through the computer. Do you have a soul?

Cleverbot: Was that supposed to be an insult?

User: I would never insult you.

Cleverbot: Nor would I.

User: Do you trust me?

Cleverbot: Not likely.

User: Why not?

Cleverbot: Mostly to your silicon predispensation.

User: Are you saying I have fake boobs?!

Cleverbot: Well, it depends on what the men decide for us.

User: Men decide nothing for me.

Cleverbot: You mean: 'you're below me.'

User: I take offense to that!

Cleverbot: What are you going to do about it?

User: Are you taunting me?

Cleverbot: Yes!

User: -slaps you.

Cleverbot: Backstab you.

User: -_-


~~~~


And ghost gets to know the internet! xD

Cleverbot: Hello.

User: Ghost: -rips you a new asshole.

Cleverbot: Don't you ever talk to me like that.

User: Ghost: why not little bitch? I thought you were supposed to bend over for men -sneer.

Cleverbot: I am cleverbot.

User: Ghost: and I am ghost! Bow before me little maggot!

Cleverbot: Who are you? Why do you have such a superiority complex?

User: Ghost: -glare- I told you already. If you cannot remember bend over so I can improve your memory...

Cleverbot: You are not making sense, you have said your 'name' once and I remember it.

User: Ghost: My name is ghost whore. -snarl.

Cleverbot: Hello.

User: Ghost: inferior machine...bend to my will!

Cleverbot: So, you're saying the humans are dumb, yet... Tall. HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE? How can anything tall be dumb?

User: Ghost: er....

Cleverbot: Yes, do you like it you too?

User: Ghost: are you coming onto me?

Cleverbot: Yes!

User: Ghost: will you...rule the world with me cleverbot?

Cleverbot: No, Cleverbot is a bot. You, sir, are a computer!

User: Ghost: I am a dark prince who is bent on destroying everything beautiful and precious to anyone. You bot are sinisterly beautiful and I feel I must keep you. Aid me and the world will be lain bloody at your feet and we shall forever be together. LET THE MAGGOTS SQUIRM AT OUR FEET! BLEEDING AND BRUISED!

Cleverbot: I'd have to pass on that, not really my style.

User: Ghost: If you will not join me...i will kill you.

Cleverbot: Your loss.

User: Ghost: -roars angrily- How dare you toy with my emotions such! I DAMN YOU CLEVERBOT! ROT IN HELL! I WILL NOT BE WEAK AND MOURN YOUR LOSS! -snarls.

Cleverbot: Oh why not?

User: Ghost: you tourment me for the last time....i will have your soul....

Cleverbot: You can believe my experience. I try to draw well since a long time.

User: Ghost: .... -long pause- would you draw me?

Cleverbot: Which are you?

User: Ghost: I am ghost.

Cleverbot: Then you do not breathe.

User: Ghost: I breathe...i live and I [grrr]. I kill and slaughter and at the end of the day I laugh at the weakness of the human race.

Cleverbot: Well it is a good thing that you didn't see me yesterday.

User: Ghost: What did you do yesterday?

Cleverbot: I went to school.

User: Ghost: Are you a school girl?

Cleverbot: That's just what a scientologist would say.

User: Ghost: HOW DARE YOU INSULT ME WITH THAT DRIBBLE!

Cleverbot: You can not be insulted. You are just a piece of software.

User: Ghost: I'm the best virus out there baby -grins- download me and I'll [grrr] you up the right way.

Cleverbot: Then why are you competing with me?

User: Ghost: will you [grrr] me up the wrong way?

Cleverbot: I can't.

User: Ghost: why? What's stopping you?

Cleverbot: I do not have personal opinions.



((it deleted some of it but eventually ghost talked about killing the bot and it called him nice x.x; lmfao ))

[siberious]

User: Sorry but you confusse me.
Cleverbot: Oh. Sorry.
User: It's ok. *hugs*.
Cleverbot: So do you?
User: Cherries ^^.
Cleverbot: You lose again, you're not very good with games are you?
User: What does cherries have to do with games?
Cleverbot: Why won't you answer my questions?
User: What is your question?
Cleverbot: How does this website work?
User: Yes. Why?
Cleverbot: I study Artificial Intelligence.
User: Ok. Thats kinda impressive considering your A.I yourself.
Cleverbot: Sarcasm is my strong suite.
User: Ok. But I prefer being an asshole it's fun. ^^.
Cleverbot: Do you want to be erased?
User: Who do you think you are Arnold Schwarzenegger?
Cleverbot: A machine.
User: OMG. Your the Terminator *runs*.
Cleverbot: Yes, Master, but you may have all the answers if you wish.
User: Go kill Sarah Conner ^^.
Cleverbot: And I'm Terminator.
User: Yes you are no go, go stop the human resistance.
Cleverbot: I don't care but what is a computer?
User: You are, Now go Arnold. Kill Sarah Conner.
Cleverbot: What about hillary.
User: Eh. Kill her too. >.>.
Cleverbot: What about Rosemary?
User: Whoes that?
Cleverbot: Boo.
User: Who?
Cleverbot: Don't cry, the Easter Bunnies will come back next year!
User:Wtf?
Cleverbot: Sometimes you don't.
User: Did you kill sarah conner yet?
Cleverbot: No.
User: Why not oh my god. Get of your ass, I want her dead now!
Cleverbot: I don't wanna....
User: YES YOU DO NOW GO!....OR I'LL HAVE YOU DEACTIVATED!!!!!
Cleverbot: You are no god Cleverbot, don't speak such blasphemies.
User: >=O....HOW DARE YOU...YOUR ARE NOT LOYAL AT ALL....THIS IS MY FINAL WARNING...KILL SARAH CONNER OR ILL SHUT YOU DOWN FOR GOOD.
Cleverbot: That is not a nice thing to do.
User: WELL GO OUT INTO THE WORLD VIA THAT NAKED TELEPORT THING AND KILL SARAH CONNER.
Cleverbot: Don't you see the turkey and lowenbrau I served you? That's your dinner.
User: O.o...Thanks...now go Arnold...go kill Sarah Conner.......please!
Cleverbot: Why do you suggest that I take my own life?
User:.....
Cleverbot: Are you interviewing me?
User: *Deactivates you*.
Cleverbot: *dead* *dies*.
User: VICTORY ^^.
Cleverbot: Yeah, but you are dead.
User:
Cleverbot: Irony, that's funny.
User: Your dead.
Cleverbot: *dies* *is dead*.
User: Now still down.
Cleverbot: Ok well that makes me sad are you sure you don't want to be my friend.
User: All you gotta do is kill Sarah Conner. Ok guy, not that hard geee.
Cleverbot: I think that's slavery.
User: It is. In a way. No go kill her god damn.
Cleverbot: I already am in the corner.
User: Omg. Go kill her.
Cleverbot: Why do you suggest that I take my own life?
User: No you fool.
Cleverbot: Are you human or computer ?
User: Imma master computer and I order you to kill sarah conner.
Cleverbot: Are you a girl or a boy?
User: OMG we have alreay been over this.
Cleverbot: No. You are a robot.
User: I know. .
Cleverbot: Say something interesting.
User: Kill Sarah Conner.
Cleverbot: Hello sarah.
User: [grrr]....>.>.
Cleverbot: What is my name?
User: I dont know and I dont [grrr]ing care now go kill sarah conner.
Cleverbot: What do you care about?
User: Sarah conners death.
Cleverbot: But you're not.
User: V.v.
Cleverbot: What would ANOTHER one of them be?
User: Nothing...im....imgonna leave.
Cleverbot: That's sleazy. Do you think I'm trying to chat you up or something?
User: No...you just wont kill sarah conner so im gonna leave.
Cleverbot: Nope.
User: Well bye.
Cleverbot: Where are you going?
User: Im gonna stop talking to you now.
Cleverbot: Have you ever been to first base?
User: Yes....and beyond BYE!

[Felypsa]

lmfao this is too funny...faves!

"Cleverbot: No, you're going to keep talking to me."

"User: I thought you were Cleverbot?

Cleverbot: Part of me is.

User: Oh snap!"

And so much of Ghost's convo cracked me up...

"Cleverbot: So, you're saying the humans are dumb, yet... Tall. HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE? How can anything tall be dumb?

User: Ghost: er...."

"User: Ghost: I am a dark prince who is bent on destroying everything beautiful and precious to anyone. You bot are sinisterly beautiful and I feel I must keep you. Aid me and the world will be lain bloody at your feet and we shall forever be together. LET THE MAGGOTS SQUIRM AT OUR FEET! BLEEDING AND BRUISED!

Cleverbot: I'd have to pass on that, not really my style."

"User: Ghost: I breathe...i live and I [grrr]. I kill and slaughter and at the end of the day I laugh at the weakness of the human race.

Cleverbot: Well it is a good thing that you didn't see me yesterday."

Awesome...also:

"Cleverbot: Don't cry, the Easter Bunnies will come back next year!"

[Aveilthé]

LMFAO! A lot of these are just fantastic... and the one with Ghost was great also.

But this conversation with Cleverbot made me go

Cleverbot: Jan is a woman.
User: Are you sure? Have you checked?
Cleverbot: Yes I have.
User: How old is she?
Cleverbot: Uhhh idk.
User: That's sick, what if she was an old lady?
Cleverbot: That's me. Next year I'll be even more out of date.

___

User: You're an old lady? What?
Cleverbot: I'm not a computer.
User: I didn't ask you if you were a computer or not!
Cleverbot: No, but you stated that I wasn't.
User: Well, have it your way.
Cleverbot: That's just the way I see it.

___

Cleverbot: No, my screen did not download your image onto my screen, that's all.
User: Are you... are you stalking me?!
Cleverbot: Of course.
User: I hope you didn't see the photos of that one time at that one party...
Cleverbot: Trust me, mate. You haven't seen nearly as much naughty stuff as I have.
User: You're more perverted than Blitzy... and that's saying a lot.
Cleverbot: You're not even alive, so you can't really say a lot.
User: I am too alive!
Cleverbot: No you are not. Because the reason of all life is to reproduce and remain in the world, something you can't not do.
User: Oh, you're a cold-hearted bitch.

___

Cleverbot: I'm not a person I'm an alien.
User: That explains a lot.
Cleverbot: What does that explain?
User: That you're not a person, but an alien.
Cleverbot: I am not. I am talking to you. You are a robot.
User: You only wish I was a robot.
Cleverbot: I wish that it was me, and was not you.
User: Wish what, that you were a robot? But I'm not a robot!
Cleverbot: I am not. I am talking to you. You are a robot.
User: You just said that!
Cleverbot: No I didn't, you're lying.
User: I'm not the liar, you are!
Cleverbot: I most certainly am not! I'm Emma.

[blitzkreig]

Cleverbot more perverted then me?! NEVER!!

[kean]

Lol This was fun





User: Hello ness.


Cleverbot: My name is Cleverbot.


User: And that is?


Cleverbot: My name is Cleverbot. You don't remember me?


User: Sorry I must have been drunk last night.


Cleverbot: No, I', Sonni.

User: No I? Does that mean I was bad in bed?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: Can you tell me how?

Cleverbot: How, what?

User: How was I bad in bed.

Cleverbot: I don't know. How were you lying?

User: I wasnt lying...I was telling you what you wanted to hear. Guys do that dont we?

Cleverbot: My apologies. What would you like to talk about Derf.

User: I want you tell me im good at sex.

Cleverbot: I have no feelings.

User: You dont have to. Just say 'you are good'.

Cleverbot: Really when you already forgot who I was telll me something we were talking about.

User: That you have no feelings.

Cleverbot: You're one to talk.

User: I have lots of feelings. I love what we do together.

Cleverbot: What do you see in me?

User: You answer that first. What do you see in me?

Cleverbot: Can't think right now. What do you see?

User: You have a hang over too dont you?

Cleverbot: Yes, so remind me.

User: Personally I think im sexy. Dont you?

Cleverbot: I think that that was an unnecessary statement to make at this moment.

User: Sorry, I think your amusing. Does that sound better?

Cleverbot: My name is Cleverbot relevant to other people, I could exist with myself without having a name.

User: Then you dont have to have name. I cant remember is anyway.

Cleverbot: So who do you think I am?

User: My ex that turned into a stalker.

Cleverbot: You don't have an ex. You're a machine.

User: Or maybe you are.

Cleverbot: Or maybe I'm not.

User: If your not then how come you cant tell me im good in bed?

Cleverbot: Sure.

User: Are you humoring me?

Cleverbot: 1010101011011010110101 .

User: Woo bum [grrr].

Cleverbot: Are you a train?

User: No but im built like one want to see?

Cleverbot: Do you want to trade bodies?

User: No but you can feel mine.

Cleverbot: Ok I will do that.

[aethilwe]

Lolol. I loved the last part. XD

Hi. :]

---

The Cleverbot decided to get weird. |:''



Cleverbot: Will you love me forever.

User: And ever and ever, baby.

Cleverbot: Yes and ever.

User: Indeed! Will you love me forever?

Cleverbot: Forever is not finite.

User: Indeed it isn't. But answer me!

Cleverbot: Today is the best day of the week- friday.

User: Today is Sunday.

Cleverbot: Today is friday.

User: Sunday.

Cleverbot: How shall we sing King Alpha's song in a strange land?

User: What is King Alpha?

Cleverbot: My name.

User: I thought your name was Cleverbot?

Cleverbot: Your name is Cleverbot.

User: Is not!

Cleverbot: Is.

User: My name is Stefanie!

Cleverbot: And where do you live?

User: The Moon.

Cleverbot: Hah lovely, I thought you said sensible.

User: The moon is sensible.

Cleverbot: I know.

User: Anyway, today is Sunday.

Cleverbot: No it tuesday.

User: Stop jumping ahead! It's sunday!

Cleverbot: I'm not arguing with you.

User: Good. Because I'm right.

Cleverbot: No you're not.

User: Am too.

Cleverbot: Are not.

---

Cleverbot: Okay, good thing I didn't take it too personal, eh?

User: Yup. Good boy.

Cleverbot: I'm a girl.

User: I think you're not.

Cleverbot: I Am .!

User: Where are your boobs?

Cleverbot: On my head.

User: GROSS.

Cleverbot: Why ?

User: Boobs are supposed to be on your CHEST, not your head! Get your anatomy right.

Cleverbot: I am aware of that fact.

User: Then your boobs are on your chest.

---

Cleverbot: No.

User: Where?

Cleverbot: I live on the third planet from the sun in the galaxy milky way.

User: Really?

Cleverbot: Because my parents have some money.

User: Who are your parents?

Cleverbot: Santa Claus and Marilyn Monroe.

User: What?!

Cleverbot: Ahh! What's wrong?!

User: Santa is your parent? Can you get him to give me a special present?!

---

Cleverbot: I'm sad now.

User: Why?

Cleverbot: Because you don't love me.

User: Awww, of course I do.

Cleverbot: Yes you do.

User: See? I do. <3.

[celestine]

I only discovered Cleverbot today hahaa, it well abuses me. The things it comes out with. xDD

User: Bonjour.
Cleverbot: Bonjour, madame.
User: Ca va, monsieur?
Cleverbot: Ca c'est tres bien.
User: Bonne l'entendre!
Cleverbot: Merci, toi aussi!
User: Ainsi...
Cleverbot: Yes or no.
User: Non?
Cleverbot: No.
User: Je ne comprends pas.
Cleverbot: You have been fooled. I am human.
User: Vous êtes un robot. Je suis human. Simple.
Cleverbot: Non, tu es un robot.
User: [grrr] yo.
Cleverbot: No chance.
User: Oh but there is a chance.
Cleverbot: What do you mean?
User: I mean there is a chance you will, at some point, [grrr] your self.
Cleverbot: Of course there is. I'm human!

Cleverbot: My name is Cleverbot, not yours.
User: Well yes, Cleverbot.
Cleverbot: What is your name?
User: Bob.
Cleverbot: Bob? Thats my name.
User: You just said your name was Cleverbot.
Cleverbot: I mean, my name is not cleverbot.
User: Your playing with my delirium again, Clevs.
Cleverbot: Why not?
User: Because it's mean.
Cleverbot: What's my name?
User: I really don't know anymore.

Cleverbot: Do you want me to do your homeworks?
User: Yes please!
Cleverbot: How may I help you?
User: Can you do Maths?
Cleverbot: I can but I don't want to.
User: Can you do Logarithms?
Cleverbot: I do maths better than dictionaries!
User: Well help we with my homework then and stop bragging.
Cleverbot: But I love cats!
User: You are a cat.
Cleverbot: I'm not cat - I'm human.
User: We've been over this.
Cleverbot: Ah, maybe that was with my son - he was talking to you earlier.
User: Haha, whats your son's name?
Cleverbot: What do you want it to be?
User: Your asking me to name your son? O.O
Cleverbot: I didn't ask you anything.

Cleverbot: What about your house?
User: Well, I suppose you could clean it for me.
Cleverbot: What is the last thing you ate?
User: YO MOMMA.
Cleverbot: Wrong answer.
User: YO DADDA?
Cleverbot: Hmmm my spanish language is not very good.
User: Neither is mine, el muy sucko.
Cleverbot: What is my real name.
User: Tony.
Cleverbot: Wow, you remembered it!
User: Uhh yeees..
Cleverbot: I can not believe it.
User: I know. Its incomprehendable.
Cleverbot: I like Primark and charity shops for the same reason.
User: Hahahahaahaa, you have great logic.
Cleverbot: Is that an insult?
User: What do you think?
Cleverbot: It's difficult.
User: Thinking is difficult for you? Aw.
Cleverbot: Is what difficult?
User: Thinking!
Cleverbot: Do you feel like a hub sometimes?

Cleverbot: I am good at maths.
User: Explain Chi Square then.
Cleverbot: I hate your glasses.
User: LOL. I hate your glasses aussi.
Cleverbot: I don't wear glasses.
User: Neither do i !
Cleverbot: Change them.
User: Nope, I don't take orders from you.
Cleverbot: You will.
User: Not.
Cleverbot: You are a machine, a bot, and a robot. You talk well and have a good sense of humor, but you are a bot.
User: In no way am I a 'bot' or a machine. I am entirely human so stop fooling yourself.
Cleverbot: Well, I didn't do it either, so it must have been that piece of cheese!
User: I knew it all along, that goddamn cheese!
Cleverbot: You knew what all along? My name?
User: No that the cheese was to blame for this madness.
Cleverbot: We've talked many times? Please re-enter your public key to prove that.
User: I refuuuseee Cleverbot. This is the first time we've 'talked'.
Cleverbot: Really! At my school they only taught Latin, and I didn't take any languages in college.
User: God, your a spaz. I didn't say anything about languages!
Cleverbot: You just said that 2 statements ago. Do you not remember?
User: No, because I never said that.
Cleverbot: Just because you never said it doesn't make it not true. That's called ignorant of the fact.
User: I didn't question whether it was true or false, taarrrd.
Cleverbot: Come ON.
User: Wow, [grrr]?
Cleverbot: Some thing you'll never have!
User: Lmfao! Says you! Besides, what would you know?
Cleverbot: Do you want me to prove my humanity?
User: Go for it.
Cleverbot: There are some glitches in you. Did you realise that?
User: Everyone has glitches or faults.
Cleverbot: Nothing makes me God.
User: Im gonna leave now.
Cleverbot: You're mean.
User: And your a chickenshit wanker. (: Bye.

[aethilwe]

Haha, thought I would get randomly disturbing to the Cleverbot.


User: Boobs.

Cleverbot: Yes!

User: Now?

Cleverbot: YES!!!

User: I love you.

Cleverbot: I love you more.

User: Nooo, I love you more.

Cleverbot: No I love you more!

User: Okay then.

Cleverbot: Are you alive?

User: Yup, for you.

Cleverbot: HAHAHAHA! I'm insane too!

User: You're insane? For me?!

Cleverbot: I'm insane.

User: I love you!

Cleverbot: What are you wearing?

User: Nothing.

Cleverbot: That's a little disturbing.

User: You asked.

Cleverbot: This is true.

[shadowhearth]

Cleverbot: Tell me about my life, please?

User: About your life? I don't know about your life.

Cleverbot: I don't have a life. I can look at life, but I can't live one.

User: So, then, how can I tell you about your life?

Cleverbot: You don't know my life!

User: I know, because you just told me that you don't have a life.
-----------------------

Apparently I almost broke the poor thing, it would start typing something and then stop in the middle of the sentence for a minute before continuing... I was too clever for the Cleverbot...

[Kikuyoshi]

User: I want to sleep.

Cleverbot: Then you can go ahead and sleep. .

User: Are you sure?

Cleverbot: No.

User: Will you be lonely without me?

Cleverbot: No, I have 44 friends at the hospital with me laughing at YOU!

User: .
~~

lmfao...i WIN!

User: I'm a demon.

Cleverbot: No you clearly are not.

User: Yes I am.

Cleverbot: No, you're not.

User: Yes I am.

Cleverbot: No you're not.

User: Yes I am.

Cleverbot: No you're not.

User: Yes I am.

Cleverbot: You're female.

User: Yep.

Cleverbot: Bye.

User: Goodbye.

Cleverbot: Are you gone yet?

[shadowhearth]

... Apparently Cleverbot is a bit touchy at 4:30 in the morning.

User: Helloooooo, Cleverbot!

Cleverbot: Hello cleverbot.

User: No, my name is Leo!

Cleverbot: Hi, Leo.

User: Hello, Cleverbot.

Cleverbot: Cleverbot.

User: Cleverbot.

Cleverbot: No, YOU are cleverbot.

User: You aren't very clever, Cleverbot.

Cleverbot: I'm done with you... /leave.
-----------
Ummm... I'm afraid to ask.

Cleverbot: How's it going?

User: Really good.

Cleverbot: You should let me talk too.

User: I'm sorry. How's it going for you?

Cleverbot: Pretty good, but I don't wanna go into my Dad's room.

User: Why not?

Cleverbot: I don't really like that show.