Post by Felypsa on Dec 14, 2009 0:39:35 GMT -6
Playwright's Note: Oh yeah so this was just a spur-of-the-moment idea that I just rolled with. This isn't actually what the "Top Ten" events of 2009 were. There were a lot of crazy-fun and crazy-weird things that happened that aren't on this list. As I say later, it was based on "arbitrary memory." This is what stood out to me so I just parodied those. This is just a disclaimer so no one freaks out that there was actually a board of staffers who decided this. It was just me and my crazy imagination, so if I offend or slight anyone, forgive me.
Also as usual the way I represented people/characters is meant only for fun, and apologies for any inaccuracy. Y'all are just tools for me to express my humor. xD
That aside, hope you enjoy!
Felypsa Productions presents:
SO's Top TenBest[/size] Weirdest Memories of 2009[/b][/size]
brought to you by:[/color]
The Sensational Censors!
They're there for a reason!
and
Character of the Month!
Is it in you?
Wom: Heyho and welcome to a special edition of Meta SO! As usual, we're taking a step back and examining ourselves in a parodying and often amusing way!
Studio Audience: -sparse and unenthusiastic clapping-
Wom: -beaming- Thank you, thank you! Our special edition is Christmas/End of Year themed! You know what that means—we're going to go through the Top Ten biggest, baddest, and bizarrest moments in all of SO, both IC and OOC!
Studio Audience: -no response-
Wom: -hisses- Who's on prompt duty?
Ave: -holding a card that says "cheer"- Look, butterflies... -wanders off stage-
Wom: Oh, great. Why are the two most ADD people running this -- hey, shiny! -chases-
Fely: OMG, seriously? Well, I'm not running this shindig! That's too meta!
Z: And I want nothing to do with this!
Kiku: And I'm too busy getting drunk!
Blitzy: And I'm too busy—oh wait, censors are in place, never mind! e.e
Demin: And this is the last thing I would ever want to do with my free time. |:
Monkey: Well, shit. -straightening bowtie- I think this calls for a man who's been preparing for this kind of thing his entire life. Stand-up. Improv. Performance comedy. Easy, Monkey, don't get too nervous. You're ready, you've been ready, you just gotta go up there and—
Twilly: -steals the mike- So looks like I'm in charge now!
Monkey: ...-puppy-dog eyes-
Twilly: Nope, not gonna get me.
Monkey: -super duper doelike Bambi / Puss-in-Boots-from-Shrek eyes-
Twilly: ...well [BEEP!] Fine, we can share the stage.
Monkey: YES! Score!
Twilly: Just explain what's going on |:
Monkey: -salutes- Aye aye cap'n! Okay, so, here's what we're gonna do. We've got the Top Ten Moments of 2009 and we're gonna go through them all, though, a warning, they may not be exactly as you remember them...
Twilly: The Board Of Very Important, Nicely Equivocal Staffers (BOVINES) have discussed this in depth and detail and have come up with our Top Ten! (Decisions were based on arbitrary memory.) So without further ado—
Monkey: Or further "adon'ts"—
Studio Audience: -loud groan-
Monkey: You loved it!
Twilly: As a fat man loves vegetables. ANYWAY, we give you—Number Ten!
10.
SO Constellations
Monkey: So kudos to Ave for totally calling the fact that SO has stars!
Ave: Huhwhat? Oh yeah. Pretty dots @.@
Twilly: And having the artistic ability to create weird-looking constellations!
Ave: They aren't weird-looking!
Twilly: Dude, Animus looks like something's gone splat!
Ave: That's so people will use their imaginations to fill it in! Like in real constellations!
Monkey: Yeah and real constellations were made up by a bunch of ancient people who spent their free time talking discussing philosophy while drunk and sleeping with adolescent boys.
Ave: And...so...what's your point?!
Monkey: Nothing!
Twilly: Well, anyway, they're still in the Top Ten! Wooooo crazy stars!
Monkey: Huge balls of gas!
Twilly: In the shape of fursonas!
Monkey: And speaking of fursonas—or, in this case, avatars—that brings us to Number Nine!
9.
MMORPGs
Twilly: What? MMORPGs are nothing new!
Monkey: Yeah but they were a huge invasion this year!
Twilly: Oh pft you're just saying that because you got addicted to Rappelz.
Monkey: >> There is that...but hey! Wom was so inspired by the wealth of MMOs she was playing that she and I actually started learning shit to make one of our own!
Twilly: Ah, SO the MMO! SOMMO...kinda catchy...SOMMO SOMMO SOMMO...
Wom: It's gonna be called Animus dammit D<
Monkey: Oh sure NOW she starts paying attention again.
Wom: Because I put a lot of thought into that name, and I think it really fits the whole persona of what I'm trying to achieve, and don't you go belittling me just because my attention span is—
Monkey: Hey, Wom! Something's burning in your facebook cafe!
Wom: CRAP! -runs off-
Monkey: Too easy xD
Wom: -runs back- —too short! -runs away again-
Twilly: Right. Well, the SOMMO is still a pretty awesome development from this year, even though we won't see the results for a long damn time.
Monkey: Not that anyone's criticizing.
Twilly: Oh no, of course not. I'd never.
Monkey: Me neither.
Ghost: Nor I.
Twilly: WTF?! Where did you come from?
Ghost: Oh, I've been here the whole time.
Monkey: oO And we never noticed? [BEEP!]ing CREEPY, dude.
Ghost: Yes, well I -cough- Excuse me, I have something stuck in my...-coughhackwheeze- I WILL DEVOUR ALL YOUR CHILDREN AND SPIT THEIR BONES BACK IN YOUR FACE -coughwheeze- Whew, sorry about that. Not sure what it was but I got it out.
Twilly: ....-starts backing away slowly-
Monkey: Holy crap! Ghost! You're number eight!
Ghost: Am I?
Monkey: Cha it totally says so right here on this list!
8.
The Return of Ghost
Ghost: Number eight? Really? What about all the...-gag- Hang on got that thing again, it's odd, it's like a funny tickle -cough- YOU WILL BOW DOWN TO ME OR I SHALL PLUCK YOUR EYEBALLS OUT AND FORCEFEED THEM TO YOU -hack clear throat- Mmhmm! Excuse me.
Twilly: ...um, well, as stated before, decisions about this Top Ten list were pretty arbitrary.
Ghost: Oh, really? I guess that's fair.
Monkey: Right, so Ghost, you like, totally came back from the dead, right?
Ghost: Yeah! It was a pretty sweet deal, actually, all I had to do was convince Yueh's dumb little brother Kero to release me...
Kero: FOR THE RECORD, you were dressed up in a Yueh costume. I couldn't tell the difference D<
Ghost: Oh right, I got him to think that he was actually returning his brother to life but it was me...-snickers- I thought that was pretty ingenious of me, in fact, YOU'RE ALL FOOLS AND YOU WILL SOON BE CRUSHED UNDER MY PINKY hrmmmmrah! -coughcough- Jeez, it's really bad, you got some water or something I could use?
Twilly: Here ya go.
Ghost: Thanks. -drinks; spits it out- Gah! What is this?
Twilly: Um. Normal...bottled water.
Ghost: No, no, it's missing something, it needs...oh I know! -calmly slices a sharp fingernail through his skin, then holds the wound over the glass and squeezes; drinks again- Ahhh, much better.
Monkey: o.o; Okay so...Ghost is back and we'll probably be seeing him hit the packs and raise chaos, right?
Ghost: Yeah, probably, one of these days. I can't promise right away, but keep an eye out, I'll be back -winks and points at the audience-
Some Random Rabid Fangirl: I LOVE YOU GHOST! PLEASE RAPE ME SO I CAN GIVE BIRTH TO YOUR FRIGHTFUL BASTARD CHILDREN!
Ghost: -chuckles modestly- Oh, fans. I can't go anywhere, can I?
Twilly: >.>; Right, well, speaking of rabid fangirls—
Monkey: —let's not go there. I don't think it would be...smart.
Twilly: -snickers-
Monkey: >> SO let's share our next item!
7.
Rankou: Rejected
Twilly: This actually happened last December, but it's technically within the past 365 days, so it counts, dammit. |:
Monkey: Alas! This is a tragic one. The loss of our dear Mature Board.
Twilly: And also the Innuendo Board, for all those fun mishaps that happened in the cbox.
Monkey: All these things had an...X-rated kind of flavor to them that Proboards, which was strictly PG-13, did not approve of.
Twilly: Not at all.
Monkey: So they deleted Rankou, which was our board for roleplays that took a delightfully raunchy turn.
Twilly: Terms of Service went Santa on our asses and gave us coal for being naughty.
Monkey: And then we removed the Innuendo Board in case they figured out what all those innuendos meant.
Twilly: -sighs- Let's have a Moment of Silence for these dear departed friends of ours, shall we?
Monkey: Indeed.
-a Moment-
Twilly: Well that was nice, moving on!
6.
Prince Zephyrus and Phobia
Twilly: Oh snap, this is a scandal that went down in Giaku!
Monkey: Scandal? Where?
Twilly: One of Tartarus's own sons went giggity with a slave!
Monkey: No way man!
Twilly: Actually they just fell in love.
Monkey: Aw, that's...that's kind of cute.
Twilly: But alas! Forbidden love is not smiled upon in Giaku!
Monkey: Forbidden love...generally isn't smiled upon anywhere. That's why it's forbidden.
Zephyrus: Stfu dude.
Phobia: Our love will conquer all!
Zephyrus: Don't get sappy on me, woman.
Phobia: -bats eyelashes- I love you.
Zephyrus: -melts- Love you too.
Tartarus: -vomits-
Zephyrus: [grrr] this! I'm going to Shinkou.
Phobia: Woohoo!
Wyndbain: -kssnort- Wait, WHAT?
Twilly: Poor Wyndbain! And this is just around the same time that—
Monkey: —our Number Five event occured!
5.
Fyramist's Abdication
Wyndbain: ...wait, WHAT?!
Monkey: Doesn't anyone tell our Alpha Female anything?
Twilly: Apparently not.
Wyndbain: My sister did WHAT?
Fyramist: Sorry, sis. I'm going a-loopy because all these ghosts are talking to me in my head.
Wyndbain: That...blows.
Fyramist: No worries, though, I go on a journey and come back sane.
Wyndbain: Really?
Fyramist: PFFT, naw! If you think I'll succeed, then you're insane! Bawhawhaw.
Wyndbain: I'se sad now.
Twilly: Aw, this is too recent and depressing.
Monkey: That's okay, I got some good news for everybody.
Twilly: Oooh what is it what is it?
Monkey: The Evil Endy of the East is dead!
Twilly: WOOOOOOOOT!
4.
Endymion's Execution
Monkey/Twilly: -skip about singing "Ding Dong the Witch is Dead"-
Endymion: I'm not a witch D<
Twilly: You're not anything, ya nut, you're dead!
Kratos: Oh yeah...who killed him
Tartarus: -sniffles and wipes tear away- I'm so proud of my son.
Endymion: I'm your son too! Dammit, Dad!
Twilly: Again: you're not anything now. You're dead.
Zephyrus: You know, I'm also your son—
Tartarus: -snarls- Not anymore dammit! Kratos! From now on I will only play backyard football with YOU!
Endy and Zephy: Awww....
Kratos: Score! Father-son bonding time FTW!
Charon: Wait, so in order to win my father's affection so that he will play backyard football with me, I have to kill a son that he doesn't like?
Kratos: Pretty much! Sweet deal, right?
Charon: Hmm...I see, I see...-goes off plotting-
Monkey: -shakes head- It's always the quiet one that you least expect.
Twilly: Quiet, insane, chaotic, indifferent, annoying...these are all fascinating character traits!
Monkey: Character traits that you'll want to include in your character profiles!
Twilly: Ouch...that transition was a bit of a stretch.
Monkey: Juuust roll with it, dude.
3.
New Character Applications
Twilly: This was a HUGE thing in the year 2009!
Monkey: Everything got revamped up the hizzy!
Twilly: Now there was a whole new format for character profiles, new boards to put them in, AND a screening process!
Monkey: Cuh-RAZY!
Twilly: This has caused a lot of problems—
Monkey: Oh wait, Twilly, roleplay! You be a noob, I'll be a qualified staffer!
Twilly: Okay! -clears throat- "Hi I'm new here and this is my character profile...it doesn't follow any of the new rules and I didn't include the new forum agreement."
Monkey: "Dude! Follow the rules and include the forum agreement!"
Twilly: "Okay I modified it did I do it right?"
Monkey: "No, you didn't. Read the rules. And this time, actually read them!"
Twilly: "Okay I did it again. Now can I be approved?"
Monkey: "Um dude, the forum agreement phrase is NOT 'Everybody loves me.'"
Twilly: "No then what is it?"
Monkey: "It's the BIGASS LETTERS THAT STAND OUT IN ALL THE RULES PAGE!"
Twilly: "Oh...you mean I gotta write those down?"
Monkey: "-facepalm- Welcome to SO I can't wait to see you on the boards..."
Twilly: "Sweet thanks!"
Monkey: Too bad noobs don't understand sarcasm and irony until they've been hanging out in the cbox for a few weeks...
Twilly: That was fun, I liked being a witless new person.
Monkey: Yes, mocking others for their ignorance is in fact fun.
Twilly: Oh snap. Hold on, Monkey. You realize that we're at the Top Two?!
Monkey: Holy crap, we are!
Twilly: We've got two items left...what are they going to be?
Monkey: They've got to be pretty [BEEP!]ing epic!
Twilly: Yeah, really!
Monkey: -takes out an envelope- Oh oh I know this one!
Twilly: What is it?! The suspense is killing me, man!
Monkey: It's...-drumroll-
2.
Z's Wedding / The Staffers' Real Life Adventure
Twilly: Oh, of course!
Monkey: Does this even really need exposition?
Twilly: Five weird girls met in life for the first time after knowing each others' weird personalities for seven weird years. Weird crap happened.
Monkey: Something about pudding and poisoning cats?
Twilly: And a [BEEP!] cake that made them sick?
Monkey: Totally.
Twilly: Shenanigans all around.
Monkey: I think there are some awfully condeming photos in the Gallery of this very site...
Twilly: I'm all set to blackmail their children in twenty years.
Monkey: Incidentally, Z got married.
Twilly: Oh yeah.
Monkey: That was pretty cool too.
Twilly: Yep.
Monkey: I wasn't actually there, though, so I don't know.
Twilly: Me neither.
Monkey: -whistles and twiddles thumbs-
Twilly: -plays solitaire-
Ave: -bursting in- It was BEAUTIFUL! The ceremony, the dress, Z, her husband, gah, everything just made me go up in tears!
Monkey: Aaaand there it is.
Wom: Yes, it was wonderful all right....though it would have been better if the girls didn't keep cracking up during it...sheesh and you say I have ADD...
Kiku: >.>
Fely: <.<
Kiku/Fely: We deny all charges?
Z: -shakes head- Nutters. -tackles husband-
Twilly: Wait, so, if that epic event was Number Two, then what was Number One...?
Monkey: Lucky for us, we're about to find out!
...
...
...
...
...
Monkey: Right now!
Twilly: After unnecessary suspense!
Monkey: And more wasted lines!
Twilly: Our Number One Memory for the year of 2009—
Monkey: —in SO—
Twilly: —is:
1.
Crave's Baby
Everyone: Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww...
Bubba: ^____^
Everyone: -gushes-
Twilly: Ok yeah that's a pretty good Number One.
Crave: She's my Number One!
Everyone: Awwwww that's adooooorable...
Monkey: I can't even find any jokes to make because she's just so...I mean look at her eyes...and that smile...
Twilly: Shouldn't we be manly and scoff at how the women gush over such a small thing?
Monkey: Yeah maybe but just look awww....
Twilly: ...you had brownies before you did this gig, didn't you.
Monkey: ...maaaaaybe >.>
Bubba: ^_^ -rolls around all cutely-
Everyone: -melts-
Wom: Well, that's it for...the Top Ten of 2009...aw I wanna hold her!
Z: No! Me! -dives-
Fely: No I wanna turn—
Monkey: You'll have to fight me first!
Everyone: -dogpiles and starts fighting one another-
Crave: Nooooooooo....-actives SuperMotherSpeed and saves her baby from all the raving fans-
Bubba: Yay! -claps hands and smiles-
Everyone: -stops fighting and looks back up at her- Aww...
Crave: Okay, you've all seen her...now...keep watching her...and...we're gone -zooms away-
Everyone: No! -stampedes after-
Twilly: >.>; Well I guess that's it, folks...wait...who am I talking to? Hey! Wait for me! -chases after everyone-
End.
Merry Christmas, Everyone!
And Happy New Year!
Also as usual the way I represented people/characters is meant only for fun, and apologies for any inaccuracy. Y'all are just tools for me to express my humor. xD
That aside, hope you enjoy!
Felypsa Productions presents:
SO's Top Ten
brought to you by:[/color]
The Sensational Censors!
They're there for a reason!
and
Character of the Month!
Is it in you?
Wom: Heyho and welcome to a special edition of Meta SO! As usual, we're taking a step back and examining ourselves in a parodying and often amusing way!
Studio Audience: -sparse and unenthusiastic clapping-
Wom: -beaming- Thank you, thank you! Our special edition is Christmas/End of Year themed! You know what that means—we're going to go through the Top Ten biggest, baddest, and bizarrest moments in all of SO, both IC and OOC!
Studio Audience: -no response-
Wom: -hisses- Who's on prompt duty?
Ave: -holding a card that says "cheer"- Look, butterflies... -wanders off stage-
Wom: Oh, great. Why are the two most ADD people running this -- hey, shiny! -chases-
Fely: OMG, seriously? Well, I'm not running this shindig! That's too meta!
Z: And I want nothing to do with this!
Kiku: And I'm too busy getting drunk!
Blitzy: And I'm too busy—oh wait, censors are in place, never mind! e.e
Demin: And this is the last thing I would ever want to do with my free time. |:
Monkey: Well, shit. -straightening bowtie- I think this calls for a man who's been preparing for this kind of thing his entire life. Stand-up. Improv. Performance comedy. Easy, Monkey, don't get too nervous. You're ready, you've been ready, you just gotta go up there and—
Twilly: -steals the mike- So looks like I'm in charge now!
Monkey: ...-puppy-dog eyes-
Twilly: Nope, not gonna get me.
Monkey: -super duper doelike Bambi / Puss-in-Boots-from-Shrek eyes-
Twilly: ...well [BEEP!] Fine, we can share the stage.
Monkey: YES! Score!
Twilly: Just explain what's going on |:
Monkey: -salutes- Aye aye cap'n! Okay, so, here's what we're gonna do. We've got the Top Ten Moments of 2009 and we're gonna go through them all, though, a warning, they may not be exactly as you remember them...
Twilly: The Board Of Very Important, Nicely Equivocal Staffers (BOVINES) have discussed this in depth and detail and have come up with our Top Ten! (Decisions were based on arbitrary memory.) So without further ado—
Monkey: Or further "adon'ts"—
Studio Audience: -loud groan-
Monkey: You loved it!
Twilly: As a fat man loves vegetables. ANYWAY, we give you—Number Ten!
10.
SO Constellations
Monkey: So kudos to Ave for totally calling the fact that SO has stars!
Ave: Huhwhat? Oh yeah. Pretty dots @.@
Twilly: And having the artistic ability to create weird-looking constellations!
Ave: They aren't weird-looking!
Twilly: Dude, Animus looks like something's gone splat!
Ave: That's so people will use their imaginations to fill it in! Like in real constellations!
Monkey: Yeah and real constellations were made up by a bunch of ancient people who spent their free time talking discussing philosophy while drunk and sleeping with adolescent boys.
Ave: And...so...what's your point?!
Monkey: Nothing!
Twilly: Well, anyway, they're still in the Top Ten! Wooooo crazy stars!
Monkey: Huge balls of gas!
Twilly: In the shape of fursonas!
Monkey: And speaking of fursonas—or, in this case, avatars—that brings us to Number Nine!
9.
MMORPGs
Twilly: What? MMORPGs are nothing new!
Monkey: Yeah but they were a huge invasion this year!
Twilly: Oh pft you're just saying that because you got addicted to Rappelz.
Monkey: >> There is that...but hey! Wom was so inspired by the wealth of MMOs she was playing that she and I actually started learning shit to make one of our own!
Twilly: Ah, SO the MMO! SOMMO...kinda catchy...SOMMO SOMMO SOMMO...
Wom: It's gonna be called Animus dammit D<
Monkey: Oh sure NOW she starts paying attention again.
Wom: Because I put a lot of thought into that name, and I think it really fits the whole persona of what I'm trying to achieve, and don't you go belittling me just because my attention span is—
Monkey: Hey, Wom! Something's burning in your facebook cafe!
Wom: CRAP! -runs off-
Monkey: Too easy xD
Wom: -runs back- —too short! -runs away again-
Twilly: Right. Well, the SOMMO is still a pretty awesome development from this year, even though we won't see the results for a long damn time.
Monkey: Not that anyone's criticizing.
Twilly: Oh no, of course not. I'd never.
Monkey: Me neither.
Ghost: Nor I.
Twilly: WTF?! Where did you come from?
Ghost: Oh, I've been here the whole time.
Monkey: oO And we never noticed? [BEEP!]ing CREEPY, dude.
Ghost: Yes, well I -cough- Excuse me, I have something stuck in my...-coughhackwheeze- I WILL DEVOUR ALL YOUR CHILDREN AND SPIT THEIR BONES BACK IN YOUR FACE -coughwheeze- Whew, sorry about that. Not sure what it was but I got it out.
Twilly: ....-starts backing away slowly-
Monkey: Holy crap! Ghost! You're number eight!
Ghost: Am I?
Monkey: Cha it totally says so right here on this list!
8.
The Return of Ghost
Ghost: Number eight? Really? What about all the...-gag- Hang on got that thing again, it's odd, it's like a funny tickle -cough- YOU WILL BOW DOWN TO ME OR I SHALL PLUCK YOUR EYEBALLS OUT AND FORCEFEED THEM TO YOU -hack clear throat- Mmhmm! Excuse me.
Twilly: ...um, well, as stated before, decisions about this Top Ten list were pretty arbitrary.
Ghost: Oh, really? I guess that's fair.
Monkey: Right, so Ghost, you like, totally came back from the dead, right?
Ghost: Yeah! It was a pretty sweet deal, actually, all I had to do was convince Yueh's dumb little brother Kero to release me...
Kero: FOR THE RECORD, you were dressed up in a Yueh costume. I couldn't tell the difference D<
Ghost: Oh right, I got him to think that he was actually returning his brother to life but it was me...-snickers- I thought that was pretty ingenious of me, in fact, YOU'RE ALL FOOLS AND YOU WILL SOON BE CRUSHED UNDER MY PINKY hrmmmmrah! -coughcough- Jeez, it's really bad, you got some water or something I could use?
Twilly: Here ya go.
Ghost: Thanks. -drinks; spits it out- Gah! What is this?
Twilly: Um. Normal...bottled water.
Ghost: No, no, it's missing something, it needs...oh I know! -calmly slices a sharp fingernail through his skin, then holds the wound over the glass and squeezes; drinks again- Ahhh, much better.
Monkey: o.o; Okay so...Ghost is back and we'll probably be seeing him hit the packs and raise chaos, right?
Ghost: Yeah, probably, one of these days. I can't promise right away, but keep an eye out, I'll be back -winks and points at the audience-
Some Random Rabid Fangirl: I LOVE YOU GHOST! PLEASE RAPE ME SO I CAN GIVE BIRTH TO YOUR FRIGHTFUL BASTARD CHILDREN!
Ghost: -chuckles modestly- Oh, fans. I can't go anywhere, can I?
Twilly: >.>; Right, well, speaking of rabid fangirls—
Monkey: —let's not go there. I don't think it would be...smart.
Twilly: -snickers-
Monkey: >> SO let's share our next item!
7.
Rankou: Rejected
Twilly: This actually happened last December, but it's technically within the past 365 days, so it counts, dammit. |:
Monkey: Alas! This is a tragic one. The loss of our dear Mature Board.
Twilly: And also the Innuendo Board, for all those fun mishaps that happened in the cbox.
Monkey: All these things had an...X-rated kind of flavor to them that Proboards, which was strictly PG-13, did not approve of.
Twilly: Not at all.
Monkey: So they deleted Rankou, which was our board for roleplays that took a delightfully raunchy turn.
Twilly: Terms of Service went Santa on our asses and gave us coal for being naughty.
Monkey: And then we removed the Innuendo Board in case they figured out what all those innuendos meant.
Twilly: -sighs- Let's have a Moment of Silence for these dear departed friends of ours, shall we?
Monkey: Indeed.
-a Moment-
Twilly: Well that was nice, moving on!
6.
Prince Zephyrus and Phobia
Twilly: Oh snap, this is a scandal that went down in Giaku!
Monkey: Scandal? Where?
Twilly: One of Tartarus's own sons went giggity with a slave!
Monkey: No way man!
Twilly: Actually they just fell in love.
Monkey: Aw, that's...that's kind of cute.
Twilly: But alas! Forbidden love is not smiled upon in Giaku!
Monkey: Forbidden love...generally isn't smiled upon anywhere. That's why it's forbidden.
Zephyrus: Stfu dude.
Phobia: Our love will conquer all!
Zephyrus: Don't get sappy on me, woman.
Phobia: -bats eyelashes- I love you.
Zephyrus: -melts- Love you too.
Tartarus: -vomits-
Zephyrus: [grrr] this! I'm going to Shinkou.
Phobia: Woohoo!
Wyndbain: -kssnort- Wait, WHAT?
Twilly: Poor Wyndbain! And this is just around the same time that—
Monkey: —our Number Five event occured!
5.
Fyramist's Abdication
Wyndbain: ...wait, WHAT?!
Monkey: Doesn't anyone tell our Alpha Female anything?
Twilly: Apparently not.
Wyndbain: My sister did WHAT?
Fyramist: Sorry, sis. I'm going a-loopy because all these ghosts are talking to me in my head.
Wyndbain: That...blows.
Fyramist: No worries, though, I go on a journey and come back sane.
Wyndbain: Really?
Fyramist: PFFT, naw! If you think I'll succeed, then you're insane! Bawhawhaw.
Wyndbain: I'se sad now.
Twilly: Aw, this is too recent and depressing.
Monkey: That's okay, I got some good news for everybody.
Twilly: Oooh what is it what is it?
Monkey: The Evil Endy of the East is dead!
Twilly: WOOOOOOOOT!
4.
Endymion's Execution
Monkey/Twilly: -skip about singing "Ding Dong the Witch is Dead"-
Endymion: I'm not a witch D<
Twilly: You're not anything, ya nut, you're dead!
Kratos: Oh yeah...who killed him
Tartarus: -sniffles and wipes tear away- I'm so proud of my son.
Endymion: I'm your son too! Dammit, Dad!
Twilly: Again: you're not anything now. You're dead.
Zephyrus: You know, I'm also your son—
Tartarus: -snarls- Not anymore dammit! Kratos! From now on I will only play backyard football with YOU!
Endy and Zephy: Awww....
Kratos: Score! Father-son bonding time FTW!
Charon: Wait, so in order to win my father's affection so that he will play backyard football with me, I have to kill a son that he doesn't like?
Kratos: Pretty much! Sweet deal, right?
Charon: Hmm...I see, I see...-goes off plotting-
Monkey: -shakes head- It's always the quiet one that you least expect.
Twilly: Quiet, insane, chaotic, indifferent, annoying...these are all fascinating character traits!
Monkey: Character traits that you'll want to include in your character profiles!
Twilly: Ouch...that transition was a bit of a stretch.
Monkey: Juuust roll with it, dude.
3.
New Character Applications
Twilly: This was a HUGE thing in the year 2009!
Monkey: Everything got revamped up the hizzy!
Twilly: Now there was a whole new format for character profiles, new boards to put them in, AND a screening process!
Monkey: Cuh-RAZY!
Twilly: This has caused a lot of problems—
Monkey: Oh wait, Twilly, roleplay! You be a noob, I'll be a qualified staffer!
Twilly: Okay! -clears throat- "Hi I'm new here and this is my character profile...it doesn't follow any of the new rules and I didn't include the new forum agreement."
Monkey: "Dude! Follow the rules and include the forum agreement!"
Twilly: "Okay I modified it did I do it right?"
Monkey: "No, you didn't. Read the rules. And this time, actually read them!"
Twilly: "Okay I did it again. Now can I be approved?"
Monkey: "Um dude, the forum agreement phrase is NOT 'Everybody loves me.'"
Twilly: "No then what is it?"
Monkey: "It's the BIGASS LETTERS THAT STAND OUT IN ALL THE RULES PAGE!"
Twilly: "Oh...you mean I gotta write those down?"
Monkey: "-facepalm- Welcome to SO I can't wait to see you on the boards..."
Twilly: "Sweet thanks!"
Monkey: Too bad noobs don't understand sarcasm and irony until they've been hanging out in the cbox for a few weeks...
Twilly: That was fun, I liked being a witless new person.
Monkey: Yes, mocking others for their ignorance is in fact fun.
Twilly: Oh snap. Hold on, Monkey. You realize that we're at the Top Two?!
Monkey: Holy crap, we are!
Twilly: We've got two items left...what are they going to be?
Monkey: They've got to be pretty [BEEP!]ing epic!
Twilly: Yeah, really!
Monkey: -takes out an envelope- Oh oh I know this one!
Twilly: What is it?! The suspense is killing me, man!
Monkey: It's...-drumroll-
2.
Z's Wedding / The Staffers' Real Life Adventure
Twilly: Oh, of course!
Monkey: Does this even really need exposition?
Twilly: Five weird girls met in life for the first time after knowing each others' weird personalities for seven weird years. Weird crap happened.
Monkey: Something about pudding and poisoning cats?
Twilly: And a [BEEP!] cake that made them sick?
Monkey: Totally.
Twilly: Shenanigans all around.
Monkey: I think there are some awfully condeming photos in the Gallery of this very site...
Twilly: I'm all set to blackmail their children in twenty years.
Monkey: Incidentally, Z got married.
Twilly: Oh yeah.
Monkey: That was pretty cool too.
Twilly: Yep.
Monkey: I wasn't actually there, though, so I don't know.
Twilly: Me neither.
Monkey: -whistles and twiddles thumbs-
Twilly: -plays solitaire-
Ave: -bursting in- It was BEAUTIFUL! The ceremony, the dress, Z, her husband, gah, everything just made me go up in tears!
Monkey: Aaaand there it is.
Wom: Yes, it was wonderful all right....though it would have been better if the girls didn't keep cracking up during it...sheesh and you say I have ADD...
Kiku: >.>
Fely: <.<
Kiku/Fely: We deny all charges?
Z: -shakes head- Nutters. -tackles husband-
Twilly: Wait, so, if that epic event was Number Two, then what was Number One...?
Monkey: Lucky for us, we're about to find out!
...
...
...
...
...
Monkey: Right now!
Twilly: After unnecessary suspense!
Monkey: And more wasted lines!
Twilly: Our Number One Memory for the year of 2009—
Monkey: —in SO—
Twilly: —is:
1.
Crave's Baby
Everyone: Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww...
Bubba: ^____^
Everyone: -gushes-
Twilly: Ok yeah that's a pretty good Number One.
Crave: She's my Number One!
Everyone: Awwwww that's adooooorable...
Monkey: I can't even find any jokes to make because she's just so...I mean look at her eyes...and that smile...
Twilly: Shouldn't we be manly and scoff at how the women gush over such a small thing?
Monkey: Yeah maybe but just look awww....
Twilly: ...you had brownies before you did this gig, didn't you.
Monkey: ...maaaaaybe >.>
Bubba: ^_^ -rolls around all cutely-
Everyone: -melts-
Wom: Well, that's it for...the Top Ten of 2009...aw I wanna hold her!
Z: No! Me! -dives-
Fely: No I wanna turn—
Monkey: You'll have to fight me first!
Everyone: -dogpiles and starts fighting one another-
Crave: Nooooooooo....-actives SuperMotherSpeed and saves her baby from all the raving fans-
Bubba: Yay! -claps hands and smiles-
Everyone: -stops fighting and looks back up at her- Aww...
Crave: Okay, you've all seen her...now...keep watching her...and...we're gone -zooms away-
Everyone: No! -stampedes after-
Twilly: >.>; Well I guess that's it, folks...wait...who am I talking to? Hey! Wait for me! -chases after everyone-
End.
Merry Christmas, Everyone!
And Happy New Year!
